An Open letter to Chetan Bhagat- Your books make me sick!

Chetan Bhagat’s Half Girlfriend might just expose the lack of substance in the IITian’s writings. His book has been criticized for not having enough meat, and only appears to cater to the frivolous and Masala-seeking readers. In short, Chetan Bhagat books can be best turned into a c-grade Bollywood movie.

Chetan Bhagat

Here’s an open letter to Chetan from yours truly…

In November 2014, the royal family of Dumraon issued a legal notice to you for showing them in a negative light in ‘Half Girlfriend’. Then, a scholar from Bihar accused you of plagiarism. Dr Birbal Jha, director of the British Lingua institute alleged that you got the plot for Half Girlfriend from his play, Englishia Boli. According to him, you had visited his institute in 2014, interacted with students and also watched a performance of the play. He added that he had even given a copy of the play to you.

You made a reference to the royal family in your latest book Half Girlfriend that is “false and derogatory in nature”. They correctly claim that the novel defames his family by suggesting that the men of the family gamble excessively and are alcoholics. They respectfully asked you to remove the reference but you turned back and ridiculed them on twitter.

Chetan Twitter

Your books are mindless in their approach and incorporate sex just to attract the youth. At times, I feel frustrated with the Indian readers who give you so much undue importance. You are the embodiment of everything that’s hopeless about the nation- love for the masala, disdain for debates. Now, you are being a JUDGE in Nach Baliye season 7. You can’t judge yourself, how can you even think of judging a dance show?

Chetan in Nach Baliye 7

You really think you are able to convince the people that they are reading literature pieces? In some twisted way, you have succeeded. That you do not know literature is evident from your writings, but your marketing skills and support is pretty strong to have taken you to this place.

You are responsible for lowering the standard of novel writing. Someone like you can be famous only in India.

Your stories talk only about women, girlfriends, sex and sleaze. Call centers are your favorite topic. Your books have ZERO literary value, they carry no original idea, contain no researched material, but despite that you have somehow managed to give an impression to people that you are an AUTHOR. Here’s the thing- You are NOT an author. You are just a wannabe who is riding on a wave of incredible luck!

“Educated girls don’t want to date a guy who doesn’t speak English and this is what I have tried to bring out in my novel Half Girlfriend.” Do you sometimes feel like showing yourself a middle finger when it comes to such stereotypical sexist statements that you make?


You said, “Somebody in Bihar feels they belong to the family, which is fictionally represented in the book. But it is fiction. So the question of defamation does not arise and I don’t know these people. I didn’t even know they existed.” Right. You were sent a legal notice by the Royalty of Dumraon in November 2014, then in December 2014. Do you remember? You didn’t pay attention to it because let’s face it, you like being the center of attraction and enjoy publicity, rather cheap publicity. Well, Mr. Bhagat, we are not dumb-witted like you. We read and we know our facts. It’s time you stop making foolish excuses of not knowing about the Dumraons and writing about them.

For a literature student, your books are a torture.  Though you extended your hand of friendship to them later, you mocked them on Twitter saying that they didn’t know the meaning of Fiction.

You have proved at least one thing. That crap sells! You are the self-proclaimed ‘Voice of the Youth’ who has got a lot of sugarcoated bull crap in his novels. But, at the end of the day, it still remains bull crap.

You write the most clichéd stuff possible. We agree that you represent the mentality of a section of the youth, but constantly writing about it reflects your mental state. Your format is amazing, talking about sexual freedom in the most unsophisticated manner. Your views are one sided and you get defensive when we talk bad about you. But, ask yourself and your half-girlfriends, are we at fault?

This is how stupid your books look
This is how stupid your books look !

It’s high time that you start pitying yourself and us for your pathetic novels and loose screws. I wish the court favors the Dumraons and you have to pay 1 crore. May be you’ll learn. Let’s hope you do, because we don’t want another letter of depreciation for you. Do not forget- Failures are the pillars of success, but please, don’t keep on failing.

Never Yours

The Chetan Bhagat Misanthropists

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